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Turning the heartbreak of stillbirth into a positive

Posted onPosted on 4th Jun

A caring Mansfield couple have turned the tragedy of losing their son, who was born asleep after 36 weeks and three days, into a positive for other parents facing similar heartache.

Emma Bourn, 26, and Matthew Nazar, 28, launched a £5,000 appeal to help bereavement care at King’s Mill Hospital, Sutton, and provide gift boxes for newly-bereaved parents in memory of their son, Albie.

Now the couple, who had to face their stillbirth heartbreak away from family, friends and the usual support groups because of coronavirus lockdown restrictions, have urged people to donate “anything they can, big or small”.

Emma said: “Following the loss of our son, we haven’t been able to receive support as parents normally would. But, sadly, even when there isn’t a global pandemic, some parents never receive the appropriate care and support they need.

“We will never forget the kind people who helped us at King’s Mill. Andrea, my midwife, who came off annual leave to help me give birth; Amy who stayed with us all day making memories with our son; Edith, for helping us to arrange Albie’s funeral and blessing him in the hospital; our bereavement midwife, Mel; and, most of all, Carly from the charity Zephyr’s.

“With the money raised we hope to help out other parents who go through stillborn and neo-natal deaths. It will go towards gifts such as memory boxes that can create precious and lasting memories of their children, just as we did with Albie.”

Zephyr’s, based at Nottingham City Hospital, provides loving support for parents and families who have experienced the loss of a pregnancy, baby or child.

Emma, Matthew and Noah.

Emma explained how her pregnancy turned to tragedy on 23rd March when the couple, who have another son, three-year-old Noah, were told that Albie’s heart was no longer beating.

“On the Monday morning I awoke knowing something wasn’t right,” she said. “I didn’t wake up to Albie’s morning kicks. I got on my birthing ball and drank some cold water.

“I asked Matt to hold my bump and talk to Albie, but (there was) still nothing. I rang the hospital, who told me to go in to be checked over, but Matt couldn’t come because of Covid-19.

“When Matt arrived at the hospital we were taken into another room to be told for the third time our baby no longer had a heartbeat. We decided to go home late on the Monday afternoon.

“On the Tuesday we went back to the hospital so I could be induced. Albie Charles Nazar was born sleeping at 10.36pm, weighing 5lbs 14ozs, looking just like his big brother, Noah, with a head full of beautiful, dark hair.

“Due to the coronavirus we couldn’t have family and friends visit us and meet Albie. We Face-timed family and close friends to meet Albie; our experience was somewhat very different to others due to the restriction in place at the time.

“Thankfully when Albie went to the funeral directors Noah was able to finally meet his baby brother for the first time. Seeing our sons together is something we will never forget and cherish forever.

“On Friday, 3rd April, we said our final goodbyes, sat two metres apart from our family.”

To support Emma and Matthew’s appeal, click here.

One new local business, Rainbow.Woods, has already pledged to support the cause by donating £1 from the sale of each of its handmade macramé rainbows throughout June.